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Many people have that friend. The one who understands and empathizes with them. The one that always knows what to say when they are upset. The one who they feel comfortable unburdening themselves to. Chances are that friend has a high emotional quotient. EQ (Emotional quotient), a measure of one's ability to perceive, respond to, and regulate emotions may be even more important than IQ, verywell mind suggests. Here’s the scoop on EQ.
What is emotional intelligence?
Emotional intelligence has both interpersonal and intrapersonal facets, verywell mind explains. On the interpersonal side, emotionally-intelligent people are those who can identify other’s feelings, understand the source of those feelings, and can empathize and show sensitivity to those around them.
Intrapersonally, those with high levels of emotional intelligence can understand their own feelings and their strengths and weaknesses. Emotionally-intelligent people don’t let themselves be discouraged by mistakes, but they also take responsibility for them.
The four major components of emotional intelligence include: Perceiving one’s own feelings and the feelings of others, tempering strong emotions with thinking and cognition, finding the source of one’s feelings, and knowing how to react to strong feelings, both one’s own feelings and others.
How does emotional intelligence help?
Calm shares some of the many benefits of emotional intelligence and why it might be even more important than IQ. One benefit is that people with high EQs can make connections with others and get along with family, friends, and colleagues. Not only does this help with making friends and building business relationships, but also emotionally intelligent people can build more meaningful relationships that can last for life.
Emotional intelligence also helps with communication. Those who have invested in their emotional intelligence will be able to to understand and relate to what others are saying, including picking up on non-verbal cues. They will be able to express their own feelings in a clear, and non-accusatory manner.
Those who are emotionally intelligent are able to temper feelings with critical thinking. This prevents rash, emotional decisions in the heat of the moment. Lastly, those with high EQs are able to “roll with the punches.” They are better at adapting to life’s chances and can handle stressful situations with more grace and resilience.
How is emotional intelligence tested?
There are a number of tests for emotional intelligence, Very Well Mind explains. Most of them fall into one of two categories: self-report tests where the testee describes their response to different questions, and in-person tests. The second category of tests includes an assessor who notes how the testee responds to situations.
Can EQ be taught
The jury is still out on whether emotional intelligence is inborn or a trait that can be acquired. However, if you are not inherently emotionally intelligent there’s some good news. First, there is a meta analysis of studies that demonstrate that people who are creative and self-confident innovators may be more individualistic and therefore have a lower emotional intelligence.
On the other hand, it’s certainly possible to be both creative and empathetic at the same time and a 2019 study found that it’s possible to improve emotional intelligence.
Calm suggests that to improve one’s emotional intelligence a person should work on incorporating constructive feedback without becoming upset at criticism. Another way to boost EQ is to learn to take responsibility for mistakes and learn to listen to others when they speak.
Emotionally-intelligent people are able to understand and temper their emotions, so to boost EQ it’s worthwhile to self-reflect on one’s actions and reactions in challenging moments and to think about how to improve one’s responses in the future.
And, of course, interpersonal relationships are a huge part of emotional intelligence, so building relationships with emotionally intelligent people can both allow one to be surrounded by support and to learn from friends and family.
Emotional intelligence is a valuable skill that can enhance every aspect of life. By nurturing one’s ability to understand and manage emotions, a person can build stronger connections and face challenges with resilience. Embracing emotional intelligence allows one to lead more fulfilling, empathetic, and harmonious lives.
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